MyPyramid.org [Satire]

Welcome to MyPyramid.org! USDA hopes the updated food pyramid, MyPyramid, will help to ease much of the confusion that has come from so-called "doctors" and "scientists" claiming that their independent, repeatable experimentation has shown red meat, processed foods, agrichemicals and irradiation to be unhealthy for people and the planet. Many of USDA's top officials have worked in the Agribusiness industry, providing the expertise necessary to develop a pyramid that best represents the truth about healthy eating -- it's not what happens to the food before it gets to your table, but simply that you eat substantial servings of all foods -- Following these guidelines will help ensure the health of American families while guaranteeing the health of Agribusiness Corporations around the world.